Landscapes

I've reached a point where I no longer find it a desirable exercise to try to remember how many years ago something took place - It happened - If any events in my life are important, in the grand scheme of things, the fact that they happened is what matters.

It's gotten harder to remember, to pinpoint times of events. Perhaps that's a sign of decline associated with age. Maybe it's just the way memory works as you add more and more and more as the years pass... also associated with age, it would seem. Probably both.

Viewing this revelatory moment as an accoutrement of wisdom would probably be wrongheaded. It's an annoyance to search my brain pan and come up empty as often as I do. It's that simple, I think.

Yet there are many times I succeed, and find it an unsatisfying exercise. Perhaps that's because so many reference points are so far advanced past the years I expected to be riding in flying cars, and those very future-world dates now sit so very long ago.

It occurs to me, now, as I'm writing this, that I've NEVER been good at such estimations, just as the reckoning of someone's age has never been a strong suit of mine. So maybe the only thing notable about all this is that I'm finally devaluing such skills.

And we'll harbor no notion of this being a surrender to the dulling of the edges, a sad and important decision that will lead to my being less and less sharp as I continue on the road to dotage. I'll read a book now and then, and will continue keeping my razor sharp mental reflexes honed by picking on people... and playing synapse challenging games of Tetris with continued regularity.

And down the road don't ask me when this moment of clarity occurred. I'll be lucky if I remember that it happened following a percocet, a big shot of Patron, and a Founders Centennial Ale at a Greg Dulli show.

Hey. It happens.

"Suck What?"
Robert Mitchum to Director John Heller on the set of "Eyes of War"
in the year 19-who-gives-a-shit?

So You Hate the Yanks, but...

So here’s the thing. As a Yankee fan I have to hear crap all the time:
- They have a history as a racist organization that extends beyond the integration of baseball.
- They have spent so much money that any successes they’ve enjoyed should be considered the fruits of the sales of that many souls to Satan.

Well folks, Jackie Robinson and Larry Doby started no great flood from the Negro leagues. But what we see here is that we can bitch about the Yanks in that respect, because they're the Yanks.

I know the Yankees have outspent everyone else, pretty much forever, and thus have so many more World Series wins, that to non Pinstripers, it isn’t funny. Only to a Yankee fan, it’s fun, and to a BASEBALL FAN, it should be as well.

World Series Winners over the last decade, their payroll and where that ranked:

2000 Yankees:
$114 /1st
2001 Arizona:
$81.2/ 8th
2002 Angels:
$61.7 15th
2003 Marlins:
$48.7 25th
2004 Red Sox:
$127.3 2nd
2005 White Sox:
$75.2 13th
2006 Cardinals:
$88.9 11th
2007 Red Sox:
$143 2nd
2008 Phillies:
$98.3 12th
2009 Yankees:
$208 1st

As a Yankee fan, we've lived with the Ed Whitsons, the Kenny Rogers, the Carl Pavanos, and have been told to keep our mouths shut because having so many trophies excludes us, as baseball fans, from the SOUR GRAPES LEAGUE, (as opposed to the Crybaby League). The idea is that if we spend enough money, we'll ultimately get it right and win yet another WS, so we're not allowed to look at the above list and note that the Yanks won 2 out of those 10 titles, though by far having that highest payroll EVERY year, in 2003 even taking a beating at the hands of the minimum wage Marlins!!

So OK, the Yankees are the richest, and will always be told they bought their titles. What exactly does that mean?

Why We Watch:
I saw beautiful, relentless baseball from a bunch of really talented guys the last two nights. I got to see a team that, when working well, was an absolute joy to watch. Joining one of the early NYC Rotissery leagues turned me far more into a baseball fan, in that I paid attention to BASEBALL, not just my favorite team. I came to appreciate performance. When Sugar Ray Leonard (who at the time I was a huge fan of) went into the ring for the first time with Roberto Duran, as a fan, I felt more joy at getting to see such transcendent performances than sadness for Ray.

Enjoying greatness, as we see it so seldom, anywhere in life, is something to be treasured.

So if you can put together a fabulous team that rocks on all cylinders, I'd rather see that than one made up of a handful of guys that shouldn't even be in the majors. When I watch baseball I want to see GOOD baseball from pros. That too, in this day and age, is in short supply.

Yet we've seen excellence, as proven by the above list, from a lot of teams other than the Yankees.

Now, of course, we also watch to see our hometown guys prevail, and our support provides us with a certain vicarious pleasure in helping our boys take the title.

Of course, I'm not an idiot. I'm a Browns fan!!! So, I get it, fellas.

But this just speaks to Yankee hating.

Who Else We Should Hate:

The Yanks and the Sox and the Dodgers pay out, by far, the most into the revenue sharing pot. This is because they are compelled to, no lofty or noble purpose here. It's meant to help level the playing field some, at worst, keeping another team or two solvent.

Check this out: ALL BUT TWO TEAMS IN MLB SHOWED A PROFIT LAST YEAR!

Folks, we have a lot of small market owners who are wealthy and are NOT putting the best team they can on the field. They are doing what happens in Cleveland, picking the two or three guys with some real value and contracts coming up and jettisoning them before they have the vaguest idea if they might have that balance of youth, spirit, energy and veteran talent to be able to get into the playoffs, where clearly anything can happen, and some serious damage might be done... and the Indians show a profit!

While conventional wisdom states that if they do well, that could lead to better attendance the next year, and the foundation to build on, the 'actuarial tables' of MLB's revenue sharing tell us that there has to be a monumental turnaround in literally no time at all to make it worthwhile for the profit seeking ownership of a team these days to follow any success by holding their hand and adding to it.

Dolan, owner of the Tribe, walked away with a profit of $181 million in 2009.

If it does NOT pay to win, the fan suffers. So what needs to happen is there have to be more strings attached to revenue sharing, compelling teams to put a greater percentage of it on the field, so YOU TOO WILL HAVE A BETTER CHANCE OF HUMILIATING THE BIG, CREEPY, RICH BITCH YANKEES AND THOSE OF THEIR ILK!

And I'll get to see overall better baseball being played more often by more teams.

Honesty 101:
If your local team had ownership with buttloads of money, willing to spend a reasonable number of said loads with the intent (successful or otherwise) of putting an awesome to watch and awesome to cheer team on the field year after year, you'd take it without a blink.

Further Honesty:
And you'd all still hate the crap out of the Yankees until the day you die.

I get it. I'm just sayin'...

back yet again?

So my wife, the proprietor at The Dolli Mama's Vintage Warehouse was showing me her 'stats' and it was kind of inspiring to see how many people and countries have dropped by to check out her recipes. Don't blame them, it's good eatin'.

For my part, I've been busy trying to find enough WD 40 to move my project YourBeerNetwork along before every possible bit of craft beer/food programming has been developed, pitched, sold, produced, archived, and moved into late night cable re-runland. That would be three different internet elements, all reachable (such as they may be) by going to www.yourbeernetwork.com

The one thing I find about facebook is the suggestion, just by the mere architecture of it, to be brief, something as you may know, I've never been very good at. So as the stats for this site tell me that no one has yet visited from Mozambique, and just basic sense tells me not everyone is on facebook, let me leave a little something here for anyone who might drop by. This is from a thread I started on facebook based on the kid who recently got cyber-pushed off the GW Bridge:

I sent a letter to my Senator last night asking about new laws, or reinterpretations of existing ones and the approaches to enforcement concerning this world of cyber assault, one that operates on all sorts of levels, with a potential that's growing exponentially. At a loss to really say how I'd frame any change, I suggested that parents be held more responsible for their kids' actions in cyberspace. If they break a streetlight, a parent has to pay. if they taunt a kid to death, well... consequence is a great motivator to teach and control. Won't change the dark components of what makes us human, but how they are allowed to manifest themselves amongst others needs to be tended to in this new arena.

Social networks and the internet in general are game changers. Perhaps laws need to be passed that DO limit our freedoms a bit. Totally against my grain, and certainly the ACLU's and maybe even the Constitution, depending on who's sitting, but the internet is NOT an exclusively American enterprise. It is an entire world unto itself that lives throughout our existing world. Maybe some international law/regulation could allow us to protect ourselves without feeling we're setting 'local' precedent that would have ramifications elsewhere where we don't want it.

And last... maybe we can legislate Fox News out the door while we're at it.

After, a pal wrote: "WOW! I agree with you, Harv! Could we be getting more conservative in our old age or just a bit wiser?"

I just think we are simply recognizing that, in so many ways, Marshall McLuhan was right about how manifest the changes were going to be when this kind of technological environment took off, growing and accelerating at Einsteinian proportions. Call it his 'Global Nervous Breakdown' if you will. I mean, it's not even Science FICTION, it simply is what it is, and we're getting outpaced by it. It's like handing an automatic weapon to a really angry monkey.

First, there is evil. There's no arguing it. It exists. This applies to everyone, old and young.
Second, youth, specifically, gives us boundless energy, raging hormones, a weird sense of immortality and invulnerability in a cocktail with a sense of doom and TOTAL emotional vulnerability. Youth is where so many great things come from as we see much less consequence to our actions.
But experience isn't there, all the modifiers and equalizers that the experiences of life bring haven't been rolled out yet. A blessing and a curse. Many don't wish to do harm, but don't have the tools to see ahead or around the corner enough to understand the idea of avoiding doing harm.
"We didn't mean to drive him to suicide." True, but what you didn't do was anticipate how damaging this might be and AVOID creating such an environment.
The difference today is in the weaponry, both in the zeros and ones, and recent generations living in a couple worlds now... and when it comes to actual GUNS, a line got crossed a while back, a chilling one changing the relationship so many have with death. It REALLY is a different time and needs to be recognized as such.
A friend once observed that there was conscious evil and unconscious evil, he far preferring to be face to face with the conscious kind. Of course this makes sense and this is why we need to deal with this problem specifically and, as a culture, need to REALLY get our arms wrapped around what is an amazingly different Operating System we're living in from as recently as 5 years ago, destined to be unrecognizable 5 years from now... as well as we can manage.

And... legislate Fox News Net off the air.

From another friend: 47 states have laws similar to Ohio's (links below), there are also Federal laws regarding cyberstalking, etc.

ORC 2903.211(A)(2) et al http://codes.ohio.gov/orc/2903.211

ORC 2917.21 regarding telecommunications harassment - scroll down for the post 9/13/2010 version http://codes.ohio.gov/orc/2917.21

Links to other states' laws can be found here: http://www.ncsl.org/default.aspx?tabid=13495

Thanks for these to Susan Mueller Baranoff.

So.... I'm just shivering a little at the landscape I think we're seeing clearly here. Gay assaults, hetero-assaults, economic fraud, even the capacity to drop a worm into Iran's nuclear control system, all paint the picture of a Deadwood with no borders, no limits, growing like an insane cancer, with such little oversight. Brave New World, indeed.

Healthcare Reform

OK, there are a lot of arguments, a lot of jaded, politically motivated crap muddying the waters. My position is that we MUST get something in place, period. Then it can be tweaked. Social Security, Welfare, Medicare and Medicaid have all been altered, fixed, messed with over the years. Let's just get started for God's sake.

But in this forum, today, a note I received from an old high school friend. Her husband, in his upper 50s, with beautiful daughters and a great wife, has a heart that doesn't work anymore. He's been hooked up to an LVAD. If you're a Grey's Anatomy viewer, it's the machine Denny was hooked up to while he awaited a heart for transplant.

Here's the note my friend sent me yesterday:

Howdy Harv....that's how we talk out West. We may be in Ohio in a few weeks/months if ---- can get stabilized on his LVAD. Pretty sure we're going to Cleveland Clinic. My sister-in-law has a house in Aurora we can use.

I'm assuming that you and Dolli are in favor of sweeping health reform. I'm really finding out how bad our system is. We pay $1300/mo for health insurance and have a $5 million lifetime cap. Good so far or ---- would already be dead (this hospital would have never taken him without a comparable plan).

So even though we've been told we have one of the best plans around, there are no contracted Physical Therapy providers in Spokane (so no Cardiac Rehab) and our co-pays are running about $150/week for Clinics, meds, etc. That brings us to $1800/mo which is OK because his bills are over 200K so far.

We're lucky because we don't have to think about bankruptcy yet. Most people we've met in similar health positions have sold everything they can to make a dent in their bills. They are honorable people who don't want charity but are losing everything. Waiting room talk is all about money not about rest and healing. I want to go home! OK, I'll stop whining but this health care thing is so crucial. Spread the word! I've been reluctant to talk about it on FB since it's too public (and such a draaag) but maybe I should. May see you soon.......XOXOXOXO

So one story from one end of the spectrum. Then look at the stories of those with a broken ankle, a kid with some violent flu symptoms, cancer patients stuck coming on and off Cobra after losing their jobs with no one who will now insure them. Then what happens?

Please:

http://www.healthreform.gov/support.html

Twitter Musings

A friend of mine, Catherine Ventura, wrote a lovely little blog for The Huffington Post. She alerted me to it in an e-mail in which she apologized for a guy she sent our way to look into sharing some of our NY office space flaking out by not showing up or returning calls after contacting us to display an interest.

First, her post, totally readable:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/catherine-ventura/the-day-my-twitter-boutiq_b_253620.html

The e-mail:

Sorry if 'Clifford' turned out to be a flake....
Hope you got someone for the space.

No worries, you tried to send us 'Clifford.' It just would have been nice if he had returned Dan's call when he decided to not show up. Oh well. people, right?

I loved your post. I was going to comment. But as each day passes I find myself closing in on, if not already embracing, my generation's version of my father's inability to figure out how to set the clock on his VCR. I find my learning curve is awful in the face of my 'artistic temperament,' or what very well might have been called ADD had that been a term in my day. My dad called it 'lazy,' of course.
So I sensed it too difficult to figure out how to subscribe to Huffington (I'm a Mac user. If a double click doesn't get me there, I'll likely either not go, or continue on and fuck something up), and will post my comment thusly:

I've found two real values in internet communication. First, in the broadest sense, it allows people to communicate without having to be in the room at the same time, and without having to have the discipline to find paper, pen, a stamp. It allows us to send off 'postcards' via quick connecting e-mails, conversations through IMs, and of course, the reality of The Jetsons, via Skype. Joy abounds!!

But it's greatest value, I think, has been the ability it gives us to rediscover the lost art of letter writing. I think this is an amazing gift. That said, I find with the advent of facebook, even I, with this literary clarity, have progressively less and less time allocated, less patience, and less desire to write lengthy tomes as a way to communicate. This is a real shame, because if I, a child of the 50's, thus spawn of the people who came of age in the 20's, am seeing this erode, then I have to believe that this 'gift' probably, outside the world of blogs (which is, I grant you, an important component here), isn't even recognized by most people, folks who are embracing a communications medium with a radical word limit.

So maybe I would approve, maybe I'd even sign up (might yet do so), if I didn't feel Twitter was the cyberworld's version of the continued attack (MTV established this on the tube a couple generations back) of the "Short Attention Span Theater." I'm not avoiding in protest. I think I'm avoiding as I can see what it might do to me, and I think I don't approve.Still, I'm glad you wrote the piece as it forced me to do all this thinking out loud, on your dime, and got me to write a letter, instead of stopping after the roughly 35 words it took to respond to your note about Darryl. Well done, Catherine.

Best

xo

As Relates to Loaded

This follows a facebook conversation about this:

If art works, not just because it works, but because the observer passionately wants it to work, then yes. Then no? So yes it did and now it doesn't. If it doesn't endure is it still art? I'm not arguing IF it endures. If it becomes art to me because I so badly want it to be, then blink twice, twirl thrice and it no longer matters to me... was it art, did it stop being art, or did I (or it) stop being relevant?

When I was THAT age I wanted everything, anything, nothing, less... but I did so, developmentally having no choice in the matter, Passionately. Youth isn't wasted on the young. It's just a simple reality that the young guzzle gas.

So I'd be OK if I called today's music 'noise' or 'sissy pop' or simply worthless crap, as that would have me doing what my dad did before me and his before him. It's a matter of culture. But here's my version of looking back at Sinatra, or Mario Lanza - Joe Louis and Jack Dempsey, and saying I can't listen to them anymore, and those boxers were overachieving light heavies in a different era. I can revisit the first three Velvet Underground albums and find just wonderful things all over them... and by the way, I like a fair amount of what I hear today, even if I don't listen to as much anymore.

Two days ago, I hit the play button and was hoping for a wonderful, comfortable, not plaid shirt and got an uncomfortable, derivative denim shirt in a room where country rock geetar licks belonged not a whit, but lived on almost every track.

Doug Yule, is that you? Lou, was that you thinking you were normal and before you decided to be an iconic art star? You thought you had an album 'Loaded' with accessibility, didn't you?

I'll grant you, it was an album of process, Sweet Jane and Rock & Roll two enduring gems, but otherwise... not a good album.

Makes me a little sad... she ain't got nothin' at all.

CONCLUSION:

I have always professed that we are all the versions of ourselves. I'm not only the 50 something Harvey, but also contain the 19 year old Harvey as well (just missing some Pall Malls and about 60% of my energy and endurance). Point is, it ALL stays with us, so above was only a, perhaps, clumsy and too quickly thrown together way of saying :

"I bought 'Loaded' on CD at Time Traveler last week and anxiously threw it on, expecting to hear a wonderful, funny, smart, and evocative album from end to end, but heard two songs that did this and the rest was largely rubbish. How disappointing."

Fact is, it DID transform me back in the day, as a stand alone album and as part of what the Velvets meant to me overall, which was huge. So I had my time with it back in the 70s and am grateful. But after I-podding 'Sweet Jane' and 'Rock & Roll' I'm done with it.

OK then. Sorry. I'll try to be m0re articulate in the future. And I will, undoubtedly fail.

6 Degrees of Face

So I just topped 300 Facebook friends. Some of them true friends, some of them friendly acquaintances through the biz I'm in, my reason for being on Facebook a hybrid of 'friendship' and 'networking.' But truly, friendships come from everywhere, or at least should, so such
distinctions should go by the wayside.

For example, I have a 'friend' in Herb Scannell. He's a serious player in the TV biz. Former President of Nickelodeon, where my ex worked and I produced a number of things, he's also a Tin Huey fan. We did work together, tangentially, on some Nick UpFronts, the most notable, the one he and I were totally in synch with as I produced Devo Unplugged onstage at the Waldorf, as "Los Devos."

But he and I, on Facebook, have talked about music and how, should I unearth my copy of that taped Devo performance, I'll burn him one and send it off. No bidness whatsoever.

In other cases, I'm an unabashed whore. I even got my wrist slapped, by the very service that even boasts the profile option of 'networking' for sending out announcements to all my pals, in and out of the business, to come see Gold Teleproductions' new website and reel, which we are, justifiably proud of. they shut down my ability to mail for a few hours as punishment. Boo.

http://www.goldtele.com

But the reason I'm writing this is because I randomly stumbled upon a phenomena. I have friends from all over. Yes, Ohio, where I live has a lot, but my school chums are spread across the country, my business associations are overwhelmingly in NY and LA. When I search a name, any name, even one attached to no one I know, pages open up where I can scroll down and almost every one of them has at least one friend we share!

Is 300 some sort of critical mass on Facebook that makes this like the you know who game?


Never felt more tribal in my life. Never had such a useless epiphany in my life either.

Just thought I'd share.

PS Since I published this, Dolli explained to me that Facebook is instinctive in the sense that it sorts, starting with number of shared friends, then location.
Thanks honey.

Next up for Dolli????

One (of 2 or 3) Reasons to Be

A Facebook Moment

From Nic:

I have this album somewhere...this is why I own a theremin now...
Machines Lothar and the Hand People
Source: www.youtube.com

Harvey Gold

April 28 at 10:44pm

Dolli bought me a therimin for X-mas two or three years ago. She also got me a musical saw the same year. My, my.

Nicholas Lawson-Padia

April 28 at 10:50pm

Reply

I'm not at all musically inclined, so it's been fun terrorizing the cats, but it is hard to play. I mean, like a real tune. I have this idea of doing "Heroin" only changing the lyrics to "Theremin". You, my friend are partially responsible for my twisted take on tunes. I must thank you here and now. You have made an impact with your visionary talent. Bless you. Hope the shows with Ralph, et al. go well. My best. Nic.

Harvey Gold

Today at 9:34am

Well I hope 'you' is more of a collective reference. The longer I go on the more I can attribute much of the forward, or rather 'off to the side' musical leanings I have to years with Mark Price and Michael Aylward. My old roomie and Hueys roadie, Rick Peters with his ridiculous fake compositions and adoration of the Bonzo Dog Doo Da Band made a real difference. And finally my pal Jim Kauffman put a set of headphones on me one day and by the end of 'Sister Ray' nothing would ever be the same again.

That said, whether it was something always inside, or an acquired thing to go along with all my pop sensibilities may not matter... the main reason I did it all these years was, certainly, given what we did, with little to no expectations of rock stardom, for the occasional comment such as yours.

Thanks Nic. Kind words, indeed.

xo - h

Sling Blade

"Y'ought not o' killed my little brother. He ought to had a chance to growed up. He would have fun sometime."

Quote of the Year

From Paul Koestner:

"I experience chunks of nothingness every night, at least during those times when monsters aren't chasing me. There's nothing to it."

Talk Me Down

... or Harvey rants his way through a 360 and will now need a nap while you berate him and his sissy logic!!!

OK , so I’ve been watching CNBC and MSNBC and tuning in (at least as much as I can stand, which is revealing a relatively low tolerance for the stuff) to get a feel for what’s going on with our economy.

Suddenly, I’m finding myself wondering about the Obama/ Democratic Party/Workingman-in-need approach to things.

I’ve been a lifelong Dem and have always believed that our tax dollars (even those couple of really good years where technically, I should have been a Republican) should be directed at entitlements for those not doing as well as us.

Obama wants to make sure the rich don’t get richer and the working Joe gets some relief. I couldn’t agree more. This POV is reflected in his taxation policy and appears to color (if not determine) everything we’re doing in the recovery packages.

So here’s where the terror sets in.

Anyone who watched ‘Network’ or read the novel could see some sense of inevitability when the big boss explains that everything in this world is determined by dollars, petro-dollars, pounds, yen, pesos, etc. etc. He is saying that global distinctions are no longer geographic or even cultural borders, but are defined by Exxon, GE, Sony… corporate entities, their fiefdoms and how they figure into the dynamic of things.

Now while of course, there are cultural issues that are overwhelming, and there are countries, and this is a bit of overstatement as to the inner workings of everything , let’s push in a bit here.

You give more money to the little guy and he pays off some debt, maybe buys a TV, and maybe the economy is stimulated.

But if you make allowances so businesses can operate more freely, there are jobs, benefits, and an economy. What I’m wondering (help me out folks) is if Ned Beatty’s speech in the movie wasn’t more right than wrong, that capitalism, a currency based world in fact, in full fruition in the 21st century, REQUIRES a recognition that corporations have to be able to act with a level of support, that the symbiotic relationship between business as an institution and the worker is, after all, only functional as a trickle down, with larger chunks of money hitting the top effectively keeping things running with a more singular sense of purpose far more than taking on the issue from the bottom up, where there’s little rhyme or reason… at least no structural or institutional controls other than the need to buy food, gasoline, heating and a roof over our heads, and many other ways to spend (or hoard) the money beyond that list serving little to no useful purpose to the economy at large.

Those of us who would be seen as liberal Democrats, off to the left hippies, have justifiably criticized the implementation of trickle down economics based on the idea that the corporations have been, in effect, answerable to no one, reflecting upper echelon personal greed, resulting in an unsupervised disaster. This is what we’re experiencing now.

I understand the pain that we’re all feeling right now as a result, and most certainly, justice, revenge, retribution for what has happened should all be on the plate, but here’s my question:

Does it appear that the system really has evolved (devolved?) to a place where the trickle down theory has actually been proven and the thing that’s wrong is how it’s been operated, not the institutional structure itself?

Is it likely that throwing money at a general population- one that is likely to hide it under their mattress and spend on the bare essentials as so many of us are out of work with NO income- is not going to right the economy?

Is it possible that with serious oversight, but stimulation – such as allowing, for a set period, corporations to bring offshore money and investments back into the states tax free for a time to allow for expansion and recovery, as it’s not being taxed now anyway…. again, with serious and unprecedented oversight, is more of an answer?


It has to be easier to enforce a discipline and a set of regulations on structured corporations than on a world full billions of individuals, in a 100+ different countries, with a 100 + different cultures, all with different agendas.

As I write this, I guess I’m seeing that the Obama administration is doing just that. Billions to corporations to keep them going, trying to regulate and go for transparency. I think, ultimately, the purpose of this rambling is to come to the realization that President Obama shouldn’t be crucified for doing what might be seen as ‘Republican’ things in his dealings with this problem, just as those of us who are supporters shouldn’t be shocked (though feel free to disapprove) when we come to see that he’s also not a Dove. He never, by the way, ever claimed to be.

It would be good, though to see some public floggings. No one can fault me for that!

I guess I talked myself down, kind of, but feel free to talk back.

First Real Funfest of '09

We just spent 10 days in Florida folks. Sounds great, right? So my friends from up north call me a coddled AWOL son of a... and the Floridians affectionately blame me for the 60 or lower temps the whole time we're there.

I finally lost it and reminded the northerners (particularly my NY/NJ pals) that just 4 days before my departure, I shoveled just under 11 inches of snow out of my drive and found the temperature to be 0 degrees the morning I left. I mean, really, WHAT WOULD YOU DO? NOT GO OUT OF SOLIDARITY, YOU MISERABLE BITTER WRETCHES?

As for you Floridians, running around in your sweats, shivering, bitching and moaning about the possible frost that would mess up your beautiful flowers... well... YOU OWE ME!!! I didn't once wear my board shorts. I had to dig out MY hoodie, which was supposed to sit in a closet until we left. Apologies that are offered will be accepted.

So this morning we get up far too early, and make our way home.

Our oldest daughter Gayle, bearer of both our granddaughters, Elliott Rose, 4 years, and Frankie Jane, 2 months, picks us up in my car and drives us home to several inchesof the white stuff in the driveway. I grab a shovel and zap a path for Dolli (don't want to wreck the MBTs... though she DID have socks on, forcing her to look , from the ankles down, like a Birkenstocked schoolmarm), and took in all the luggage, computers, etc.

Dolli and Gayle decide to each grab a shovel (thanks to this year's visit to Lowes, we have 38 of them) and between the three of us, knock off the driveway in 15 minutes or less (small drive). While out front, Gayle grabs the paper from across the street, tosses it into the drive, I hand it to Dolli, she throws it in the house and... locks us out.

All cell phones and keys are in the house... and it's kind of chilly. I circle our old jernt and confirm the only unlocked window is behind a screen. So I tear the screen and muscle up what has always been a tough window wide enough for Gayle to slither in.

I get one of those green plastic yard 'end tables' from the back for her to boost up, and as she steps on it, she does a Three Stooges and steps right through the frozen (now completely shattered) booster.

So I do the school kid thing , lace my fingers, boost her up and in she goes, unlocks the door, and we resume shoveling.

We finish up and I get a mallet, managing to loosen, then lower, the window without shattering it. THAT might have been the big victory of the day.

.
That and then ME, of all people, later this evening picking the top 5 (out of 12) winners at Miss America, only erring by having the winner and the first runner up reversed. The new Miss America, btw. looks a lot like a brunette, taller, Lauren Ambrose (from '6 Feet Under' Fame). How weird.



OK not that spectacular, but that's the story.







I DID, however, while away, read Michael Chabon's "Gentemen of the Road" and found it to be delightful. He has written that most adventures occur in the effort to make it to some destination away from our home, and the trip back. Makes sense to me.
OK then. Now That's All Folks! 'nite.

NEWS

OK, so I don;t have a lot to write about... at least in quantity, but there's one big one and we need to lift the mood of this site for a minute:

News Item #1: Frankie Jane Carter. Born 11/24/08 21" long 8lb. 13 oz. I am a Grampa times two now and thrilled by it.


News Item #2-infinity: Nothing as important as News Item #1.

More later. HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

Mark

I want to be filled with joy...

- Joy over the years of strengthening Mark did with his life force so that it might rocket to the heavens.
- I want to be happy that Mark feels no more pain, that these last four years have brought him varying amounts of joy, music and love to go along with his suffering, suffering that's no more.

- I want to feel so very grateful for the years I managed to travel a path that involved Mark, to experience what was the most singular of experiences one could enjoy, that of Mark Richard Price.

- I want to remember with a smile the Tin Huey gig at which Mark played a riff so ridiculously complex, creative, and so remarkably uncalled for, that we all stopped playing, screamed, maybe threw a couple things at him, probably pushed or punched him, then resumed playing the song.

And I do... all the above.

And yet I'm so very, very sad for me, because my Mark isn't here anymore. For all the above and all the good spiritual events that may have taken place leading up to and since his earthly death, what I suffer is the inability to speak with him, to see him, to laugh with him, to actively, in a physical realm, love him.... this, of course, also includes yelling at him.

I'm sad for everyone else who no longer has access to Mark by picking up a phone or walking into his room, or getting on a plane, picking him up at the airport, or opening our door and seeing that smile only he had.

I'm so sad. So very, very sad... and so, my friends, is Swensons, and some lonely assed Galley Boys.

Any offerings , by request of Mark's brother Stephen, should be made to Hospice by the Bay up by his place in San Rafael , CA.

http://www.hospicebythebay.org

or direct to the contribution page:

https://www.hospicebythebay.org/Foundation/Contribute_Form.html

Golly kids.

Paul's on a Roll: A Political Message from Joe Sixpack

JOE SIXPACK SITS IN FRONT OF A DRAPED AMERICAN FLAG, CRADLING A SIXPACK OF BUDWEISER. HIS BASEBALL CAP IS REVERSED AND HIS SHIRT ADVERTISES HIS ALLEGIENCE TO THE DETRIOT LIONS.

JOE

Hi, I’m Joe Sixpack, and given the choice of having to sit through a session of Face the Nation or tuning in to old reruns of Baywatch, I think you know where I’m keeping the plasma screen tuned.
But while I’m a big proponent of self-sedation, mostly to ease the pain of watching my Lions get their asses whupped every weekend, I can still spot a snow job when I see one.
So Sarah, you smiley-faced, suffix-clippin’, double-talkin’, muck-rakin’, commie-watchin’, earmarkin’, bridge-buildin’, caribou-filetin’, tax-rebatin’, gay toleratin’, soccer mommin’, prompter quotin’, bogus stat totin’, drill baby drillin’, snake oil sellin’, self-promotin’ maverick for the little guy… Thanks, but no thanks!

JOE POPS OPEN A CAN OF BUDWEISER AND TAKES A BIG GULP AS WE FADE TO GRAPHIC:

THIS BUDDY BOY’S FOR OBAMA

VOICE OVER: I’m Joe Sixpack, and I (BURRRRRRRRRRRRRRP) approve this message.